Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Nothing but tears...

This is sweet Caleb on his 3rd birthday.

My dad and I at the beach.

This is a picture of my dad and I on my 16th birthday. He knew he was dying...his eyes look sad to me.

You would think a birthday would be a great and exciting day. I just feel really depressed. Tomorrow is my 25th bday and I don't want the day to come. This will be my first birthday without my dad. He used to make each and every birthday a special day for me. Usually the day before (Dec. 9) he would call me at 10:49pm and tell me how tomorrow (on my birthday) he was going to call at 10:49pm because that is when I was born. So then my birthday hits and he would call WAY TOO early and would always be the first person to wish me a Happy Birthday. Then like clock work at 10:49pm he would call and tell me the story of how I was born and how he was mad at my mom because I was not a boy~HAHA! But then after he would tell me the story, he would tell me that he was glad I was his daughter. Wow, I am getting teary eyed writing this. I am just a hot mess today. Today is my Step-dad Jim's 60th birthday. It is a good day for him because he can finally order off of the senior citizen menu. He is all about a discount. But today is also my cousin Caleb's birthday. He passed away a few years ago and I just can't help but cry because I miss his sweet face and his innocent voice. I can't write anymore...the tears are streaming.


eM said...

Sweet Brittany ♥ I'm sorry your dad is not here for you :( That's a nice story about him calling you, you are very lucky he took that time each year (I dont think my dad would even know when it was my birthday, let alone what time I was born!) I hope you will have more peace tomorrow on your birthday... at 25, you are more beautiful than ever, inside & out and you have a strong family now to lean on! :D Take joy in them! Maybe you could tell them the story your dad told you, I'm sure Christian would like to hear it!
*Hugs* and most sincere Birthday Wishes!!!

Michelene said...

B, You are a HOT mess. I promise you can make it through. I want you to start reading Psalms. You have to. The bible is true and God's promises will carry YOU! Please lift your pretty face to heaven and hold on to HOPE. I love you, thank you for sharing! I am going to call you now, it is 6:25. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

HeSaysI'mTheOne said...

Happy birthday Brit! I remember you at 16. I am so proud of the woman you've become. Don't be sad. They are in a better place than us, watching over you. Try to enjoy your day.