Sunday, May 31, 2009

Home sick...


(I layed by the pool all alone today to have some peace and quiet and time to think) Doesn't the pool look refreshing??


On Friday I drove from South San Fran back 'home' to Fresno/Clovis. This time, I am finding it really hard to get back in the car and drive back to SSF. When I met Aaron all he could talk about it was moving away from South City and buying a house and us having a great family together. For some reason, I am thinking that is not what is really going to happen. I agreed to move to South city under the condition that it was temporary. I know he has his son there, but people make it work. I am just really whiny and complaining right now because I am down in the dumps, so please forgive me. I am not going to sit here and bash the bay area. For some people it is the place to be. But for me, it will never be home. I hate that you pay 2 grand for a tiny shack and renting is a must. It is way too liberal for my taste and I find it difficult to find people who share my similar views and beliefs. An ideal weekend for me is laying out by the pool and BBQing with friends. When can you ever do that in SSF with it always being 55 degrees? I dont want my child to go to school in South city. I want to raise them in a more conservative environment. I have so many goals and so many ideas on how I want my life to be but I am finding it hard to get my husband on board. I find it hard to make him really listen to what I am saying about what I want. How do two people come to an agreement or compromise on their future???

2 comments:

Michelene said...

It was so fun to have you here this weekend. I am not good on this issue, because I am that conservative that loves laying out and BBQing. Compromise is really hard. The meeting in the middle is tough because neither one is 100% satisfied. What are the Tracy plans? Too far for Christian? It gets hot there, you can lay out and BBQ. Get a job so you can drive home every weekend. I miss you already. In Morrobay, the weather feels like S.F. We have been on the beach, but it is NOT hot and the sun comes and goes. :(

Lacy said...

If you ever get the answer to that question let me know. All I can say is that I only wish I lived in CA. But I totally understand the whole never feeling like home thing. It sucks and marriage is hard!